I am a very orderly person.  I always start at the beginning of a task--never in the middle--and proceed from there:  One, two, three....but this last couple of weeks I have been in limbo.  I called my daughter Pat and told her that I had gone through fifteen bags of Cheetos in the last fifteen days, and she started laughing at me.  "You never do things like that," she said.  "You never let us eat junk food.   You never even bought junk food.  You always eat healthy!"

"I know, I know," I told her.  "But I am in limbo over this move and Cheetos seemed like a good distraction.  I understand now why people who are stressed find comfort in food.  However, it is not comforting.  I want to pack some things, but it is too early to start doing that.  I want to hire painters and carpenters and carpet men, but I still don't have a final contract.  I have to wait.  And wait.   I lie awake at night trying to decide what step one, two and three are going to be.  What do I pack first?  Who do I hire to do the first repairs on the house?  How am I going to get all of this done by myself?"

We are supposed to take our burdens to the Lord in prayer.  And I do.  I just pick them back up when I am through praying.  God must get totally disgusted with me.  I am trying to stop thinking about it all, since it doesn't do any good and just makes me mentally tired.  But it surely is difficult.  Ken always had such a calming effect on me.  He never worried about anything.  He brought peace to my Type A personality.  I wish he was here.  He would say, "Everything will turn out okay.  Stop worrying about it."

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge him and he shall direct your paths." Proverbs 3:6

I'm trying.  I'm really trying.  I certainly do need some  mind clearing direction.