My motives were all wrong--I know.  But it's the truth.  Never said I was perfect.

After a few months, Ken would come home and there was nothing for him to do.  I had done it all.  He didn't even have to mow the grass.  We never spoke about our argument and how he had over reacted.  He had been so mad that he had left for an hour or two.  When he came back, he had said, "I didn't have fifty cents to check into the BOQ."  And then he went to bed.

There are a lot of ways to say "I'm sorry", but after a few months I gave up on waiting it, and just kept on with my plan to make myself indispensable to him so I could walk out the door.  Yep, I was still mad.  He was going to miss me when I was gone because I had made life so much easier for him.

Then one night, after dinner, when I was washing the dishes, he got up out of the recliner, laid the paper aside and came to the kitchen and began to dry the dishes.  You know, there are a lot of ways to say "I'm sorry."

I melted.  How could I leave a guy that would finally "get it?"  That he had been a jerk.  That I was lonely.  That he was all I had.  That I needed his company.

So I didn't leave him.  For which I am eternally grateful.  It was a stupid idea anyway.

Proverbs 31:10-12  "Who can find a virtuous woman?...The heart of her husband safely trusts in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.  She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life."

I was not virtuous.  I was spiteful.  But we both learned a lesson.  He realized that I needed attention, and I realized that I needed to carry my own weight.  It worked for 57 years.  I miss him.