James 1: 18-19  "Of his own will he begat us with the word of truth, that we should be a kind of first fruits of his creatures, Wherefore…let everyone be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger:  For the wrath of man does not work the righteousness of God."

If ever there was  a person swift to hear and slow to speak, Ken was it.  And his response when I was angry was  to just listen, and watch me.  Just watch.  So frustrating.  I wanted him to react, but he never did.  The difference in our ages was a good  thing.  He was very patient.  I was in a strange place with not a single friend, no family, no car and living at the end of nowhere by the reed covered backwaters of the Florida shore.  Not another person for miles.  I spent my days waiting for him to come home.  He spent his working with cadets.  It was grueling work.  He came home really tired every day.  And hungry.

But with no car, I couldn't go get groceries.  So most nights we would go to the grocery store and try to figure out what to cook.  I had never bought groceries.  I didn't know what to do with them.  But I tried.  I really worked hard at it.  Some of my efforts were inedible.  But Ken ate it.  He never said a negative word.  Except once.  "I can't eat Spam.  I'll eat anything you fix but Spam."  Seems like when he was in Korea, the supply ship couldn't get in and the only thing the cook had on the shelves was canned Spam--for a month.  "Spam and eggs, Spam sandwiches, Sweet and sour Spam, Chopped Spam with Mac and Cheese, ….I just can't do Spam," he told me.  Everything else I put in front of him for fifty-seven years, he ate.  And because he was so good about my efforts, I didn't give up.  I got better at it.

Be swift to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.  Great advice.  I was so blessed to have Ken for my best friend.  "Janie's a great cook," he told his friends.  "She's always ready to try something new."  Encouragement and praise work wonders.  Criticism doesn't.