I was awakened this morning at five-fifteen by strobe lights.  Police cars, fire truck...I knew what it meant.  My friend Dean across the street had lost an earthly battle and gone to heaven.

He and Jeanine had spent the days during the power loss with me--I had power, they didn't.  He was so sick.  She was so exhausted.

Dying is an unruly affair.  Those who love you keep trying to help you with the struggle you are going through...oxygen, morphine shots, but it is an unruly ballet with doctors, nurses, health care workers...

It is hard to watch.

For the ones left behind, there is a chasm, a moment of "...what am I supposed to be doing now that this is over..."  A period of disorientation.  Everything you've been doing for weeks and weeks suddenly stops.

People bring food because they don't know what else to do.

When you lose your life partner, you have to reinvent yourself.  You don't belong to anyone special anymore.  My friend Jeanine is going to start a new journey.  It's not an easy one...but over time...you learn the "aloneness" part of your vow, "Til death do us part..."