Carolyn (in Pryor) and I have been discussing the book of James--who wrote it?  Was it James, one of the twelve disciples, or James, the half brother of Jesus.  We finally have agreed that it was the brother of Jesus--based on the way both James’ are mentioned by other books in the New Testament.  We both will start teaching that letter by James this next Sunday.  We both like to anticipate questions that someone might ask--which they never do.  Bible trivia takes up a lot of brain space.

Well, yesterday my passenger side mirror came loose.  I drove it into the Lincoln dealer expecting them to tightening a screw or something simple.  No.  Nothing is ever simple.  I should know that by now.  I have to have a completely new mirror.  And of course, they can’t get one.  They quit making parts for my 2008 Town Car.  Now I have to find one at a car junk lot.  Solution?  Call Craig. Craig’s solution: buy a new car.  But I love this car.  I don’t want a new one.  I don’t want to learn where all the new buttons are...and what all the new electronic stuff does. 

Jeanette went on line and found one, so maybe it won’t be that big a problem.  I hope not.  Truth is, I can live without it because I always turn and look over my right shoulder if I change lanes.  I don’t trust the mirror because there is a “blind spot” and you can hit something if you aren’t careful.  I’m sure you know what I mean.

 Yesterday, I discussed a subject that is the heaviest I have ever brought up.  I figured that by today, I would have an entire community of you readers out there down on me for what I wrote.  Thank you for your silence.  It is golden.  Trying to love people is good advice.

I went to my General Physician yesterday...for the last time.  She is going to a less stressful part of medicine.  I’ve been with her for seven years now, and we have become friends.  When I left her office, she gave me her personal phone number and asked me to please call her and let her know how I am and not lose touch.  She also called a physician that she admires a lot--and asked if they would please take me on as a client.

That will make the transition a lot easier when I need prescription refills.  She said I am a medical mess--however, she said I am a cheerful mess--and she wanted to choose who I went to.  There’s no point in being gloomy when you have lived as good a life as I have lived and reached the old age of eighty-four and still kicking.  I think I am in good shape for the shape I am in.  You can be the judge of whether I still have my mind.

I thank God every day for his blessings.  I should have kicked the bucket when I was thirty-four and they removed the walls of my heart and left me with no beats.  Or fourteen years ago with advanced aggressive breast cancer.  Or in a number of close calls on the road through the years.  We need to thank God for what we have--and not for what we have lost.

Ken taught Sociology for over thirty years and of course there were multiple case studies printed in text books that were sent to him by publishers  that presented sexual deviations from male-female sex. Since then, the entire LGBTQ...xyz discussion keeps expanding with new letters. 

We are on a slippery slope.  If there is agreement that you are “born that way,” the next step is you are born preferring sex with children or goats.  We can add the letter P and G.  There is no end to it.  And the community that does not agree with the “born that way” side of the discussion is pushed to agree--or they are judged to be judgmental.

Sex is a drive.  Like hunger, or thirst.  It pushes life forms to engage.  If there was no sex drive the species would die out--because it is a rather odd thing to desire to do without a drive to participate.

  

It is probably better not to say anything.  But there is such a push to get people to agree that all forms of sex are blessed by God--by shaming people who think otherwise.   I am starting to feel a little defensive when people say I am judgmental if I don’t agree to discuss it. I am not a judge.  I agree to love everyone.  

Today I am making chicken salad. Chunked white meat, pecans, celery, cranberries, etc.  Yum.  My granddaughter Amy is coming for lunch.  

She is enrolled at the college here...I always call it Central State.  Just when I figure the name of a college out, they change it.  Amy works at the Oklahoma City zoo.  She is getting some kind of degree in management of zoos, or parks, or something like that.....?  There are so many specific degrees anymore.  

We are getting 5G on our street.  I think that is what they call it.  They have managed to tear up everyone’s yards, and tear up sprinkling systems for two of my neighbors.  AT&T.  enough said.

Jeanette brought my supper last night.  Sweet and sour chicken--it was fabulous.  I love anything Chinese.  Panda has a “orange chicken” that when I go and get it, there is enough for four meals--I freeze three.  I always love it when I pull one of those out of the freezer for my “surprise a meal.”

Yesterday my surprise a meal was chicken pot pie filling.  I put it on toast.  Yum.  Sometimes, I pull something out of the freezer and ask myself why i froze it in the first place.  I’ve started giving myself permission to toss it.  I was raised that you NEVER throw food out--so it has been hard to do.

 I am changing what I am going to be teaching--two weeks from now.  We just finished Ephesians, Philippians, and Colossians.  All of them written by Paul while he is in a Roman jail--a hole in the ground with no way out.  He encourages everyone with his letters.  At the same time, he is miserable, cold, alone, and not knowing what is going to happen to him.  But he doesn’t complain.  He encourages.  Blesses.  Teaches.  Writing letters.

In two weeks, I will begin teaching the book of James.  Some think it was written by the apostle James.  But most scholars believe it was written by Jesus’ brother James.  A man who finally realized who his brother really was only after the resurrection.   James knew they had different fathers and were half brothers, but in thirty-three years of being in the same family, he didn’t know Jesus was the Messiah.

And Jesus didn’t show up beating a drum when he started his three year mission of preaching the Kingdom of God.  What were Jesus and James doing during Jesus first thirty years?  We know he helped Joseph with carpentry.  We know he went to Jerusalem and interacted with the priests--and that they were amazed at his knowledge of the scripture.  Whatever was going on between the two brothers during those years certainly affected how James wrote this short epistle.  You immediately know you are not reading something that Paul wrote.  James is unique in style.

I have two more great-grandchildren on the way.  That will make ten grand, and ten great-grand.  Mercy.  My four children have twenty off-spring--children and grandchildren.  I never in a million years would have thought of such a clan back when I married Ken.  

And when you add in all of their spouses, that’s twelve more.  And of course, I add in Ann and her family, (eleven) my sister and her family (seven) and my Brother and his family (I don’t know how many--some I’ve never met), we all make up a small town.

I don’t even try to remember anyone’s birthday, or anything else.  I’m the oldest leaf on the tree in my family.  I just pray for them, that all of them will be believers and spend eternity in heaven together.  So far, so good.  Somewhere in the Bible it says God will bless his faithful to the seventh generation.  If I start with my grandmother, that’s six generations that I know. 

Sometimes I write something, re-read it, and delete it... I love this Mac Air.  It makes blogging so easy.  I remember when the electric typewriter came along, I like to never broke the habit of reaching up to shift the lever to take me to the next line.  If you are old enough to remember carbon paper, and correct-o-type, you know what I’m talking about.  Now, this Mac even corrects my spelling and graphical mistakes.  I love it.

Friday again.  Ann isn’t coming to go to breakfast--she’s on vacation.  My appointment with my publisher for lunch was cancelled.  So I have a day to myself.  I am going to work on the flower beds.  The heat has almost burned them up.

All but the weeds.  You can’t kill them with heat.  Or anything else.  You have to pull them up.  Or Roundup them--which is poison and I hesitate to use it very often.

Bringing the succulents in for the winter is coming.  Getting them ready to move inside will take some time.  I dread that, but I don’t want to lose them.  I’ve spent years getting them to the size they are.  One year when I brought them in, ants had built nests in the pots and I had a virtual ant invasion in my kitchen.  That wasn’t fun.

Squig has started eating sweet potatoes.  He loves them.  I wouldn’t have thought of that if the vet hadn’t suggested it.  So, I eat them too.  I had forgotten how good a buttered sweet potato was.

My eating habits have become, “Whatever.”  I don’t seem to be as picky as I used to be.  As long as I don’t have to cook it, I’ll eat it.

Today is my wedding anniversary.  August 18, 1956.  Ken was with me for 57 years--I keep celebrating.  66 years ago.  It seems like yesterday.  God knew I didn’t have enough sense to choose a person to live my life with and plopped Ken on my doorstep.  Literally. 

He asked me to marry him, I said no.  He proceeded to break the sound barrier over our little burg of Pryor week after week--until people in the town were saying, “Janie, marry him so we can all get some rest.”  He was 25 years old, back from Korea, knew what he wanted and didn’t give up.  I was 18, and didn’t have a clue.

“What’s it going to take,” he asked me?  I was being flippant when I answered,  “Three quarters of a carat, in platinum.”  It arrived in the mail the next week.  I realized I had to make a decision.  I thank God every day that I made the right one.  He was awesome.  Everyone describes him as “Bigger than life.”  That’s true.  

I’ve taught women all of my life in my church.  The problems they have, I never encountered.  Ken was the most giving, unselfish person I have ever known.  If I wanted something, he wanted me to have it.  He handed me the paycheck every month.  “Learn how to spend it,” he said, “I’ll be gone most of the time.”   I was just a kid.  It took awhile, but I got there.  He never said a word about what I did.  He loved me.  What more could a person want.

It rained last night.  About a quarter of an inch.  We will take all that we can get.  

I am going to get rid of some furniture that I have had for ages.  It just sits there, doing nothing, waiting to be dusted.  

I gave all my depression glass to my granddaughter Amy, she asked if she could have four place settings of the pink sparkle dishes she ate off as a child.  I gave her twelve.  And all the side pieces. 

Stuff means nothing unless it holds a memory.  I want less.  And less.  I’m not going to throw a party...unless it’s one like I had last week where the girls do everything and I sit and watch.

If something that I have holds a memory for you, come get it.

I understand the phrase, “Less is more” now.

Craig came over and fixed my printer.  He is awesome.  Any thing I need, he comes.  Jeaninne called this morning to see if I needed anything from the grocery store.  Carolyn called to see if I was up this morning.

I love my people.

I went to the grocery store this morning for the first time in two months.  My friends keep me stocked when they go, I don’t need much.  I was amazed at the prices.  I kept hearing about it on the news, but it’s different when you walk down the aisles of the store.

I don’t know how truly poor people are buying food, paying for rent, utilities, car, gas, clothing for their children or anything else.  It’s no wonder people can’t afford to go to work, pay child care, and repairs on anything--car, or their appliances.   It makes me sad.  This is different than when I was growing up.  We were poor if measured by today’s terms, but everyone had hope.  There seems to be a growing hopelessness now.

While buying groceries, I realized what a little part of my income I spend on the food necessities--as a percentage of what I spend.  Mostly I spend on house and personal upkeep.  Lawn, house, car, cleaning essentials--we used old rags, etc.  We didn’t ever think of our how our lawns looked back then.  And the mowers were the push kind.  

There was an entire meat section of horse meat...which grocers said was to feed people’s dogs.  But my mom told me that some people were so poor they ate horse meat.  But there was hope.  We have got to get hope back for those who have lost it.  Let’s figure this out together.

 With Cushing’s Disease, (which is what Squig has--a liver thing) comes a side effect.  He throws up if he ingests too much.  So I am feeding him small portions all throughout the day.  Dry food, canned food, rice, sweet potatoes, etc.  Which....if I give him too much, he throws up.

And he has a preferred place to do that.  The living room carpet.  The rest of the floors are for the most part tile.  He doesn’t like tile.  I wait until it dries, then vacuum it up--which leaves no trace.  But the waiting until it is dry is irritating--to say the least.  

We have had discussions about this, but he isn’t listening to me.

He rules my roost anyway.  Little by little he is losing weight.  He seldom has jump-up-and-play-puppy days any more.  But last night he got his toy and brought it to me.  I threw it, he wandered over and looked at it, then looked back at me, and didn’t bring it back.  Bless his heart.  He wanted to, but just didn’t have it in him to do it.

Watching someone leave slowly is heartbreaking.  You want to help, but there is nothing to be done.  All you can do is love them, and make it as easy as possible.  Chicken breasts seem to help.  So I buy  tenders, grind them up and sprinkle them on everything he eats.  He now knows the words, “Do you want some chicken?”  That perks him up.  I love him and he loves me back.  What else could a person want. 

I now hold the record for the mess of the day (week, month, year).  I seldom drink cola, but yesterday I poured a glass of Dr. Pepper to have with a sandwich--then set myself down, put the TV clicker on the arm of my chair, the plate with the sandwich in my lap and the glass of Dr. Pepper on the floor.  And proceeded to knock the TV clicker off the arm of the chair with my elbow.

It landed upright in the glass of cola, which then tipped over onto my phone, my open Mac computer, and an electric strip which held the plug ins for the lamp, shredder, hot pad and a couple of other things.  Not to mention all over the carpet.  

What a mess.  I have learned a lesson.  Not only can I not do two things at once anymore, I can’t even manage one thing at a time.

Everything is sticky.  I did my best to clean it up.  Took the batteries out of the clicker, but every number on the face of it is wet and oozing.  My phone won’t work.  It’s a miracle that there wasn’t a fire from Dr. Pepper in all of the slots of the electric strip.

I never let my kids drink any kind of “pop.”  I think I will restrict myself as well.  Obviously, I can’t handle it.

I am going to get my teeth cleaned today.  At my age, I’m lucky I have teeth to clean.  But I still have good teeth.  I have always been a fanatic about brushing and flossing and it’s paid off.  I still have one part of my body left that works as it was intended to work!!!

The luncheon yesterday at my house was a success.  I sat in my recliner and the group did everything that needed to be done.  They even answered the door and let guests in.  

They brought all the food, and one of them brought ice and filled glasses.  I had told them that they were always welcome to have a party at my house but that I couldn’t do any of it myself.  They rose to the occasion.

The only bad thing was that my cleaning ladies (who usually come twice a month) didn’t come--they cancelled because three of them had Covid.  Luckily, my house doesn’t get dusty.  Nobody knows why.  The house across the street that I first lived in got dusty.  Every house I ever lived in got dusty.  This house doesn’t.  It’s very unusual.  It had been a month since the cleaners were here and when I started to dust, there wasn’t any dust anywhere.  It is a blessing.  At my age, anything I don’t have to do is a blessing.

And I am discovering that much of what I always thought had to be done was just busy work.  Either that or I am growing lazy??

I had the connection group at my house for lunch.  Eight people.  They brought the food.  I didn’t even have to answer the door.  Everyone stepped up and did everything that needed to be done.

But I forgot to post.  My bad.

My friend Carolyn, (Pryor) called last night fit to be tied.  She had just given up (after 45 minutes on the phone) on having a conversation with a representative of AT&T.  One of those, “I can’t understand you, can you get me someone who speaks English.”  Followed by an indistinguishable  “Hello.  Hello.  Can I help you.”  Repeated over and over.  Then, “One moment please...” long silence...different unrecognizable voice.  That’s when you get to state your problem all over again. 

She moaned, “I just lost a piece of my life I’ll never get back!  And accomplished nothing.”  They wanted her to pack the phone stuff in a box and mail it to them at her expense.  They said it would be $99 to come to the house and get it.”  She finally called Nathan (grandson) and he took care of it.  No charge. Problem solved.  We all need a Nathan in our life.   

She had me in stitches...because we have all been there.  I had just listened to my friend across the street relate her exact same conversation with an AT&T rep the day before so I knew all the details.  We’ve all been there.  That’s what makes it so funny.

Carolyn said one of the good things was that there won’t be AT&T in heaven.  We will have a direct line to God; there will be no “Press 1 for God; Press 2 for Jesus: Press 3 for the Holy Spirit.”  I could hardly listen because I was laughing so hard at her.   

 I had two questions Sunday as I was teaching my class.  Both concerned Paul’s use of words.  (He has a number of words that he uses repeatedly, that other of the writers seldom use.)  First, I asked what was the difference between “Wherefore,” and “Therefore.”  

“Wherefore” comes when Paul is using what he has just said to make a summation.  He uses “Therefore” to challenge them to do what comes next...after they have understood the “Wherefore.”

My next question concerned the difference between the words “which,” and “who?”   We read the verse in Philippians 4:13.  “I can do all things through Christ which strengthen me.” I pointed out that the word “which” is used...not “who.”  

Obviously we can’t do all things.  It doesn’t say “Christ who strengthens...” There is no “who” in the verse.  The verse should be rearranged to read I can do all things which strengthen me through Christ.”  Words matter.  I grew up discouraged because I thought I should be able to do anything in the world because I was a Christian.  When I finally understood the verse, I realized that if something would strengthen my life--things which strengthen me---I could do it no matter how hard--because if it was going to strengthen me, Christ was going to give me strength to do it.  He wasn’t going to help me grow wings and fly.  There are some things we aren’t designed to do.  We can do all things “which” strengthen us--through Christ.

Friday....It seems like every time I turn around, it’s Friday.   The days drag, the weeks zoom by.  How does that happen?  Ann will pick me up in a bit to do the sales.  She had Covid really bad, so it’s been six weeks since we went to Jimmy’s Egg for breakfast.  

Over the last few years, we’ve made friends with people who eat there every Friday.  One of them called me last week to find out what happened to us.  “We thought you both died,” he said!  

The waitress’ name is Julie, and she takes care of the entire group keeping our coffee cups full.  One of the guys (before he retired) was head of an Oklahoma “fishery” where they raised baby fish and stocked ponds.  He always has a funny fish story.  One of the group comes from Guthrie and meets a friend there who lives in Moore.  Halfway for both of them.  

The first thing I did this morning when I got up was fill a cup with Darjeeling Tea--then tip it upside down all over on the carpet.  Great way to start the day.  Maybe the rest of the day will be better than that.

I’ll start over again Monday.  Maybe by then I’ll have something interesting to write.

I took Squig to the vet yesterday and they did all of the tests that he needed--everything was super improved.  I’ve been giving him two different medications every day for the last two months.   (He has Cushing’s disease.) He doesn’t like them, but we get it done.  I win.

Only problem is that he has lost another pound--10.5 lbs now.  Down from twelve.  And he is anemic.  Which is not surprising since he has been taken off of all fat.  The vet said to buy sweet potatoes and roast them in the micro-wave--to get more calories down him.  Canned would be easier, but she said use fresh.(I know I have written too much about my dog--this is the end of it)

I like this vet a lot.  She always leans over and picks him up in her arms.  He likes her too.  Even though he gets shots, he is always eager to go in the building.

This can’t go on forever.  I know that.  But it sure is hard to think about.  Someone asked me if I would get another dog when Squig is gone.  No.  I’m not going to do that.  Watching family and pets suffer is too much.  I’ve lost all the people and pets I want to watch go.  My cousin Ann--that I spend a lot of time with--just put her “Georgie” down.  It was awful.  Becky has lost Mayh, Annie, Max.  Pat has lost four or five dogs and never got over losing “Trouble.”  Dogs.  They are wonderful...I’ll probably get another one even though I’m saying I won’t. 

The days have been cooler.  I sat on the back porch yesterday and there was a cool breeze and lofting white clouds.  Lovely.  Squig liked it too.

The eagle was back---watching Squig--who only weighs 11 pounds.  As long as I stay close to the dog, the bird keeps his distance.  I understand it is against the law to kill an eagle, but if this one gets close, he will be a dead bird.  There is a sanctuary over at Arcadia for eagles and this one needs to go back home.

Pat told me that the bird was a kite.  Nope, I know the difference.  The wing span alone is a give away.  The white head as well.  Three foot wingspan.  Live and let live...unless the bird wants to eat my dog.

Squig is going to the vet today.  He has Cushing disease which is destroying his liver.   We will redo his bloodwork and get all of his shots.  I really like this new vet.  Her name is Dr. Strong.  She picks Squig up and nuzzles him until she has his trust.  And he is a good judge of character!  Squig likes her.  That’s good enough for me.

She has explained all of his meds to me and what they do.  She even wrote the instructions down for me (by hand)  so I wouldn’t forget.  One of the drugs has to be compounded.  My advice is, “Don’t let your dog get Cushing’s disease.”  Treatment is involved.  Not only expensive--but the dog is worth everything to me.

 Sunday, I mentioned to the women in my class that I knew them pretty well--and that I knew they wouldn’t be tempted to do evil.  Satan doesn’t tempt Godly Christians that way.  Evil is no longer attractive to a person who has turned their life over to Christ.  We obey Him because of love, not because of fear.  We are different inside.  We want to do what is right.  We carry God’s name: Christian, and don’t want to embarrass our Father.  It’s not a matter of following some list of rules.

Instead, Satan will tempt you by putting something good in your path.  Something that moves you away from the better thing.  The thing you are supposed to be doing.  Evil wants to tempt you to re-prioritize what you do and get you distracted, so that you end up doing a lot of good things but never get back to the best thing...the thing God wants you to do.

We let good things get in our way, and sometimes end up not having time for the things we are supposed to be doing.

I guess a better way of saying that is, “First things first.”  If that has happened to you, look at what you are doing that keeps you from doing what you should be doing.  Re-prioritize your life in the order it should be.  Then, the good things that drive you to exhaustion every day won’t get into the way of God’s plan for your time.  For your week.  For your life.